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As I entered the extremely big mall I was hit by a tremendous wave of heat and deep fried food. I climbed up the steep zigzag stair case, the height terrified me as I climbed up higher and higher navigating trough the hundreds of people that stood in my way.
I entered McDonald's I hear heaps of declined credit cards and hoped mine wouldn't be the same, but then the ear piercings fire alarm goes of and we all had to exit the mall "AAH!!!!!" everyone screams. "EXIT THE BUILDING USING THE NEAREST FIRE EXIT" I had to stand out side for a few short hours until we could go back in at least I got Christmas supplies "merry Christmas son".
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Hi Aidan I like how you used lots of describing words. It reminds me of a story that I wrote. next time you could check if you have capital letters in the right spot.
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